Kindness to Self = Invoking Self-Acceptance

Kindness to Self = Invoking Self-Acceptance

                                                                                                            

                                                                                                        - Ms. Manisha Varma

Ms. Manisha Varma is a Counselling Psychologist with over two decades of rich experience working with youth across the spectrum of psychological and wellbeing concerns.

Ever heard of Self-Compassion? Yes, it's a term involving You in the context of You. A context that one is often unprepared for. Or rather not wanting to accommodate many times?

And why may that be the case?

In my interactions with youth, we have often had this discussion about functioning on autopilot as we criticize ourselves. But when it comes to motivating and supporting ourselves, does that approach work?

More often than not, it doesn't.

So what are those ways in which one can inculcate Kindness to Self? Here are a few quick pointers:

1. Acknowledge your True Self:

Your true self is a bunch of possibilities but with Reality in it. What this means is, you can achieve up to the extent that your mindset allows. Your Reality in short is a translation of your approach to everything. How you build it and build around it will make your True Self emerge. Sometimes in ways, you wouldn't have imagined.

The more you work towards awareness of your True Self and ways to sustain it, the better you incline to commit to dealings with the world.

2. Allow Expressions of Talent:

During discussions, people often mention career shifts or job changes as answers to the ultimate expression of talent. Do such changes guarantee that all your potential gets utilized? What about creativity? Do you get to express that entirely as you go up the ladder of your career path?

Do you express different sides of yourself in formal or mundane contexts? Do you come in your own way or curb the magic within you? The magic is one of unique creativity waiting to blossom. What opportunities do you provide yourself and action?

Think about the above questions. You could come up with ideas galore to allow yourself to thrive with talent.

3. Being Your Best Friend:

Friendship can be a boon at every stage in life.

Have you observed and sensed what it means to be with your best friend? Having a Best Friend could often mean a sense of care, comfort, and support. Someone who listens and accepts you.

Are you able to replicate the same mechanism for yourself? Can you be your own best friend? 

Being a Friend to yourself is like accepting the full package of You - thoughts, feelings, and perspectives combined. 

Appreciating the human side of you and having a heartfelt non-judgemental conversation. 

Visualize the impact it would have on you. You may not need validation from others and the outside world.

Being Kind to Self is always possible. It would impact the way you relate to others. You would be gentler in your dealings with others, develop better bonds with trust, and have closer connections. This in short means that you are being a blessing both for yourself and others. 

Accept yourself. See the difference.